Monday, 21 January 2013

Cannabliss! Pain and Relief

As you know or don't depending if you read my blog I have fibromyalgia and C.F.S chronic fatigue syndrome aka M.E) I was diagnoised a little over a year ago and i am still pretty much at square one with how to treat it.. Fibro is a very painful condition and its symptoms include ymptoms of fibromyalgia include:
  • Chronic muscle pain, muscle spasms or tightness
  • Moderate or severe fatigue and decreased energy
  • Insomnia or waking up feeling just as tired as when you went to sleep
  • Stiffness upon waking or after staying in one position for too long
  • Difficulty remembering, concentrating, and performing simple mental tasks ("fibro fog")
  • Abdominal pain, bloating, nausea, and constipation alternating with diarrhoea (irritable bowel syndrome)
  • Tension or migraine headaches
  • Jaw and facial tenderness
  • Sensitivity to one or more of the following: odours, noise, bright lights, medications, certain foods, and cold
  • Feeling anxious or depressed
  • Numbness or tingling in the face, arms, hands, legs, or feet
  • Increase in urinary urgency or frequency (irritable bladder)
  • Reduced tolerance for exercise and muscle pain after exercise
  • A feeling of swelling (without actual swelling) in the hands and feet
Fibromyalgia symptoms may intensify depending on the time of day -- morning, late afternoon, and evening tend to be the worst times. Symptoms may also get worse with fatigue, tension, inactivity, changes in the weather, cold or drafty conditions, overexertion, hormonal fluctuations (such as just before your period or during menopause), stress, depression, or other emotional factor.

Im on Cymbalta and Anmitriptilyine as well as Ixperim for pain relief. I woke up this morning in agony with my ankles,knees and wrists as well as feeling ice cold and a slowly developing pain is creeping across my shoulders now.My head feels heavy and sore and I'd love to be just left alone, no offence to anyone.I'm just finding it hard to physically talk and keep up with conversations. I absolutely hate feeling like this and would give anything not to have this condition. I don't like to say illness as i feel it gives it to much power. At least if i say condition i feel i have some control over it.

C.F.S is quite debilitating the symptoms of that include...

  • Fatigue
  • Loss of memory or concentration
  • Sore throat
  • Enlarged lymph nodes in your neck or armpits
  • Unexplained muscle pain
  • Pain that moves from one joint to another without swelling or redness
  • Headache of a new type, pattern or severity
  • Unrefreshed sleep
  • Extreme exhaustion lasting more than 24 hours after physical or mental exercise

As you can see they mirror certain Fibro symptoms so to have both conditions leaves me physically and mentally exhausted most days especially in the winter times.  I cannot work for the foreseeable future and find it hard to go to the shops even. The tablets i take don't work in the sense that i still always feel pain and tired. They take the edge off and makes life a bit more bearable. Recently i saw a study conducted about how they want to classify these sort of conditions as mental disorders which has the Fibro/C.F.S community up in arms. Most of would agree that theres no a snowballs chance in hell that we would make up such pain or get so down about it. I know there are people out there who think 'oh no I'm ill' and make the symptoms seem so much worse that they actually are etc, i get that but Jesus to tar us all with the same brush is so damaging. I struggle every day to try to will myself better ad often end up quite upset and cry because of the loss of loss I'm experiencing, When i was younger i loved extreme sports. I still do, but cant participate any more. I loved going mountain biking, cycling till my joints burned, skateboarded, i wasn't very good but i loved it, roller bladed and had a BMX if i wasn't playing video games id be doing one of those things.

As i got older and after a couple of accidents 'the fear' would set in and i stopped been so dangerous and reckless with my body lol but i still cycled and used my roller blades. I also used to swim.Id go training every Monday, Wednesday and Saturday but my times unfortunately were always a few seconds short so i knew i couldn't make a career out of it. But i had Art and loved drawing and creating characters etc so i wasnt so bummed out by it. So as you can see my life was always pretty energetic and i was always on the go.

About 5 years ago i start developing symptoms of Fibro but i didn't know what was wrong with me. It wasn't so bad then just every few months id get so tired and sore and it would go. I just learnt to deal with it maybe blaming work because it was busy or id have to do extra days that type of thing. I was also dealing with family stuff then between my Dad suddenly dying after a short battle with cancer and my ex boyfriends family situation.Plus we were in a 2 and half year court battle with an old landlord, which we won in the end but it took its toll. I started to struggle in work.Bearly making it in on time, sitting  there for a half an hour before work crying because i was so tired and sore and forcing myself to go to work. I sometimes would go in and then pretend i wasn't feeling great purely cos i didn't think i could make the rest of the day.I often felt so guilty doing this as i did like my job and all the girls i worked with. But to say to your manager , 'oh I'm so tired i need to go home' wont work . It was such a struggle and id get home and fall asleep. My ex would come home from work and would often make the dinner and sort me out. He kept telling me to quit the job but it was never a good time. When is a good time to quit a job in fairness. But the one thing i believe kept me going was the fact i smoked cannabis.

I smoke weed because it works.Simple as that!

Cannabis has been used for medicinal purposes for approximately 4,000 years. Writings from ancient India confirm that its psychoactive properties were recognised, and doctors used it for a variety of illnesses and ailments. These included a whole host of gastrointestinal disorders, insomnia, headaches and as a pain reliever frequently used in childbirth. Due to big Pharmaceutical and tobacco company's it became outlawed, even the production of hemp became outlawed. Nowadays some states in America you can buy it legally and with the law passing in Colorado and Washington,maybe we are starting to see a big U turn in its value. I fear it'll be a long time before Ireland and England catch up as the so called 'ex[ert' reports keep reclassifying and declassifying it. Theres far to many 'horror' stories out there designed to keep cannabis and its useful properties down. Not everyone is suited to cannabis just like some people cant take certain medications but yet they remain legal.Its only if theres a few deaths related to a pharma product do they ban it. To date no deaths have been linked to cannabis.In fact you'd have to continually smoke 15,000tonnes to overdose or i heard once (maybe someone can verify this) but if you fall asleep under a cannabis bush at night you can die because it secretes a poisonous gas at night?? i don't know if that's true but yeah..pretty much the only ways you can die from it.

When i smoke it, i get days of relief from it and feel normal. It relieves the blinding headaches i get  the nausea i get from the pain, it helps me sleep it gives me a quality of life. It isn't for everyone as you can be allergic to it or it may just not feel right for you. But damn it we all have free will and should have a choice to use it. I'm not even talking about everyone blazing up (though that would be wonderful and peace would consume the earth) I'm talking about proper controlled use of it.

(The following i lifted from a site because I'm too tired to write it out in my own words)

Few herbs offer a wide variety of therapeutic applications like these:
Relief of muscle spasms
Relief of chronic pain
Reduction in interlobular pressure inside the eye
Suppression of nausea
Weight loss - increase and restore metabolism
AIDS - Marijuana can reduce the nausea, loss of appetite, vomiting from the condition itself and the medications as well.
Glaucoma - Marijuana relieves the internal eye pressure of glaucoma, and therefore relieving the pain and slowing or even stopping the condition.
Cancer- Many side effects of the medication to stop cancer can be relieve with Marijuana, some studies suggest that Marijuana tends to slow down the progress of some types of cancer.
Multiple Sclerosis - Muscle pain, spasticity, tremors and unsteadiness are some of the effects caused by the disease that can be relieved by Marijuana.
Epilepsy - in some patients, epileptic seizures can be prevented with Marijuana use.
Chronic pain - Marijuana helps to alleviate the pain caused from many types of injuries and disorders.
Anxiety, Depression or Obsession - Even though mild anxiety is a common side effect in some users, cannabis can elevate your mood and expand the mind  This is a link to the History documentary on Cannabis and one on the medical use of cannabis

And its all true. I dont know how Michael puts up with me sometimes as i get very depressed and down and i tend to take it out on him.Its hard for someone to live with a person with chronic Illness.Its hard because they would do anything to take your pain away. I get embarrassed asking for help. I dont like been reliant on people. I know its hard for those around me too and i hate been a burden. I wish i was normal.For Michael more than anyone. I always wish that he knew me before this and not the mess hes ended up with. I am getting help and stuff but theres so little known about Fibro, so many conflicting issues and treatments but i keep telling myself as little as 10 years ago M.S wasn't that well known.Now look at sufferers of it.So much more is known and so many more treatments available for it.Same with arthritis. Its just right now, its hard. I have met some really great people through facebook and a group i go to that we all help each other durning the bad times.Its because we all understand what we are going through and can sympathise and help.

I recently went through a rough patch with Mikeypoo , stuff I'm not going talk about here as it was between us both but it was so stressful for us both.We both heard things from each other we didn't like but we understood each other and it has hopefully brought us closer. He doesn't smoke but is a huge supporter of it and always wants me to have it I was honest from the start with him with my condition and my smoking. I played down my condition and had done for ages but it did neither of us any good. Honesty fro now on.I just don't like him getting upset over it. He could have anyone he wanted but stays with me for some crazy reason but always brings a smile to my face and makes me feel good about myself.

My Ma has been brilliant too. Making me dinners and helping me with stuff and just understanding it and knowing i need to be alone sometimes. My friend Ash always makes me giggle and the nights we stay over with eachother are totally the funniest ever. My other friend Tammy is always there with a listening ear and always calms me down or happens to be going through the same stuff as me at the time. Ive a new friend on Facebook Thom , who has the same thing as me ans its great to talk to him about 'new' stuff that happens as hes suffered it longer and can offer me relief in the sense that I'm not going crazy. Theres all my cannabis buddies on fb too , various forums help too. So never think you are alone though it can be isolating and sad, there always someone to listen and be a friend.

(I wouldnt mind some feedback on this and my personal email is or follow me on Twitter at @themadgiraffe80 Im also on Google+ you can find that through gmail. I will start to use it more..i promise..kinda lol)

1 comment:

  1. you're not a mess. you my ho. you're my perfect girl