First of all, when people fight, you are angry at that person. Not the rest of the world. If you come to me for advice realise I'm not fighting with either 6 of you. i am not going to take sides. That other person hasn't done anything on me in certain situations so I'm not going to bad mouth them alongside you. If you listen to gossip or just get half truths from people without asking the individual themselves whats going on? then you are a moron. You claim to be best friends with him/her yet listen to someone you barely talk to and believe them. You build a whole story in your head first then somehow believe yourself and have the mother of all rows with all of you missing the point. Something that can be sorted in a matter of minutes , gets dragged out over 4 days and i get dragged in.
Now, i dont mind listening and helping out a wee bit but do NOT ask me to join in , in the slagging off and trying to get me to choose sides. Its your fight. Not mine. Does anyone actually stop to think ,how the person you are dragging into this might be feeling? Do you ever stop to think 'hang on they are good friends and I'm saying all this shit about them? See , the thing about all this is, when you finish badmouthing that person or persons, and everything is rosy in the garden and everyone is best friends again and going for drinks like its some celebration, i always remember the names you called that person how you 'really' think that person is and how 'you never really liked them anyway' What a 'cunt,crazy,slapper,mentalist' they are and how you've always thought this.
Because if they are that bad , why do you still hang around together? only cos you heard something or read something that may or may not have been true you deem them to be the worst in the world, feel hard done by and come to me expecting me to think the same as you.But yet this all affected me badly. Cos now I'm left thinking this is what you actually think of each other and I'm the only one who knows this. If the person you think is so bad, was told what id know and what you actually think i GUARANTEE you would not be friends now. But I'm not vindictive. I'm not like that. Even if i was to do it, i can see how vindictive and how you twist things so ill end up looking like a trouble maker and this has happened a few times in the past.I'm sick of it . I'm sick of been made out the bad guy when everything is rosy again.
How many chances do you give someone? When somebody is just letting you down and knowingly letting you down its heart breaking. How much is a person supposed to take? How easy it is when all the drama is around you but no one takes the time out to think, shit this must be affecting you pretty bad I'm sorry? When trust is broken its hard to get back and you don't get the right to be annoyed if it takes that person a while to learn to trust you again. Your the one that messed up. Never just assume that after a few days everything is fine and forgotten about. Likewise distancing yourself from that person isn't going to help. You should be constantly telling that person how much they mean to you. Whether it's a friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, husband.. Whatever.. You should be bending over backwards to regain what's lost.
I'm sorry if anyone takes this personally that's not my intention. Like i said I'm not naming anyone or situations but no one ever actually seems to take me into consideration with this so even if I'm just taking to myself here at least ill listen.